


The secrets we keep

by Luckybug



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrinette, Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Complicated Relationships, Confusion, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Marichat, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, LadyNoir - Freeform, Marichat, Romance, Secret Relationship, Secrets, Slow Burn, Sneaking Around, ladrien, minor Adrien/ Kagami, minor Luka/Marinette - Freeform, so much marichat, the secrets we keep
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-23 09:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30053490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luckybug/pseuds/Luckybug
Summary: Marinette struggles to balance her chaotic life, good thing she has Chat Noir to keep her grounded. But when their friendship starts to trickle into something more serious, Marinette has to decide how much she's willing to lose, for a small taste of freedom.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Kagami Tsurugi, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Luka Couffaine/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	1. Can you keep a secret?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kaiylaannk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiylaannk/gifts).



> Ah! It feels good to write these guys again, buckle up guys because we're boarding the angst train and its a one way ticket! I really hope you guys enjoy this!

Marinette was used to things being difficult. Ever since she accepted her position as ladybug nothing had been quite as easy as her prior mundane life. Living atop a bakery that her two loving parents owned had made for a simple but happy life. She had friends she loved, and a part time job at the bakery whenever she had the time. Her life was perfect, but she supposed she did always long for something more. Something that came wrapped up in red and black spots, with adventure tied in a bow.

But now, things were difficult. She was never one for lying, it made her feel guilty and nauseous. Lying was for bad people and Marinette was not a bad person, just a good liar. The thought made her cringe. She had become a good liar hadn’t she, her entire life was basically a lie.

From the moment she woke up in the morning to the moment she went to bed, she was living a lie.

Sometimes she wished there was a vacation from being ladybug. A moment where she no longer had to be her, where she could just be Marinette. When she was with Alya, she was constantly reminded by the fact that she was lying. Alya, Ladybugs number one fan would be crushed by the knowledge that Marinette was ladybug and hadn’t told her.

Not only with her friends but with her mother. She could only picture her mother’s reaction to knowing she was risking her life for Paris everyday.

“Marinette!”

She lifted her head quickly, eyes wide as Alya snapped her fingers in her face.

“Yes sorry, I was just thinking.”

“Yeah, I can tell by the drool on your mouth.” Her cheeks flared red as she furiously scrubbed at her lip.

“What’s got you so out of it?”

“Long night I guess.”

“FaceTiming luka.” She sang Lukas name, and Marinette felt her heartbeat quicken. She had been talking to luka a bit so it wouldn’t be a lie, but hearing his name made her feel sick to her stomach

“Yeah we talked last night.”

“How exciting. How are you guys doing?”

Marinette collected her books exiting the classroom behind her best friend. How were they doing? She chewed at her lip hugging her books to her chest.

“We’re fine.”

“Fine?” Alya shook her head groaning. “Marinette it’s your first boyfriend I’m going to need more details than just fine!”

“Alright alright! Lower your voice please! It’s going good I guess, he invited me on vacation with his family during spring break.”

“Marinette! That’s huge! Have you guys kissed yet?”

Marinette felt her cheeks burn as she looked anywhere but at Alya. “Yes but it’s not a big deal Alya. And plus I don’t even know if I want to go with him yet.”

“What? Why not?”

Marinette shrugged. “I don’t know. What if it’s awkward.”

“First of all, juleka will be there so you’ll have someone else to talk to, and second Lukas your boyfriend! You shouldn’t feel awkward around him.”

Oh if only Alya knew, but how could she? Marinette would never tell her, she had decided that nothing was safe from Alyas judgment. She was a great friend but she was easily excitable and kind of pushy which was good sometimes but not right now.

“I wouldn’t say things are awkward, it's just still new is all.”

“This doesn’t have anything to do with Adrien does it?” Marinette stopped walking, her eyes flickering over to said boy. He was laughing at something Nino had said, arms crossed as he leaned against the wall. She felt her face warm yet again. The years had done him well, he had gotten taller but yet, never quite got rid of his boyish features. His hair had grown to be more tousled but his eyes were as big and green as ever.  
“Marinette.”

She snapped back to Alya and shook her head, eyes lingering on Adrien for a moment. “No way, I’m totally over him. School will be over soon and we’ll all be moving on. I’m completely over that whole crush.”

Who was Marinette fooling, this wasn’t some crush. It might've been at first but the more she got to know Adrien, the more time she spent with him the more certain she had become that she was in love with him. But she had a boyfriend, and Adrien had a girlfriend

Kagami.

Marinette wouldn't say she disliked Kagami, quite the opposite. The two were friends and she enjoyed her company it was just that Kagami did not seem like the right person for Adrien.

He would finally joke around with all of them, he seemed to have really been coming out of his shell but when Kagami was there he was quiet. Still and careful, like someone walking on broken glass. She had watched the look Kagami had given him when he would be silly like the rest of them, almost like Kagami thought they were too good for them. They had started out good she supposed. She had even supported them a tiny bit, no matter how much it had hurt. They would laugh and joke around but maybe it was the pressure of their families that was destroying what they had. 

She didn’t want to blame Kagami, it was the way she was raised. Don’t speak unless spoken to, don’t act unless told to. They had given her a complex she supposed, but if that were the case then it was her responsibility to work through her trauma and not let it ruin another person.

It’s one thing to seek help from someone, it’s another to destroy their life. She shook her head, hoping it would erase the thought. Adrien was not her responsibility, it wasn’t up to her what he did. She casted one last glance at him before turning back to Alya.

“Besides, even if I wasn’t Adrien has a girlfriend and there’s nothing I can do about it.” She felt the sympathetic look before she saw it.

“I’m sorry Marinette, but maybe this trip will be good for you. It’ll give you and Luka some alone time.”

She shrugged, pulling her bag further onto her shoulder. “Yeah maybe. I’ll see you later Alya, I actually have to meet Luka after school. I’m helping him with his paper before his show tonight.”

“Must be nice having a university boyfriend.”

Marinette gave Alya a playful shove before bidding her goodbye. She walked slowly to the bus stop, she would be heading to Lukas dorm seeing as she had moved out after graduation. She had been a few times but today felt heavier. She wasn’t completely sure why but she did have an idea. The bus trip was short though it felt like an eternity. In all honesty, she would rather go home. Was that how it was having a boyfriend? Weren’t you supposed to want to be with them all of the time? Luka made her rather nervous now, and she wondered if maybe her feelings were wavering.

“Hey Marinette.”

She gave him a smile, accepting his hug. Her face sat awkwardly against his chest, though she still snuggled it in. “Hey.” She allowed herself to enjoy the hug before pulling back. “Want to get started?”

Luka gave her a mischievous grin, tapping his chin. “Start what?”

“Your paper you said you had to…” She paused, finally catching on. “You liar!”

Luka laughed, blocking Marinette’s small punches. “I’m sorry Marinette! It was the only way I could get you to come over here!” she froze, guilt filling her. She dropped her arms and looked up at him. “You’ve been kind of avoiding me.” She didn’t respond, the small piece of thread sticking out of the worn carpet capturing her attention. What was she supposed to say?“I just want to know if I did something wrong.”

“No no! You did nothing wrong Luka. You’re always so kind and wonderful to me but uh, I don’t think I should go on that trip with you Luka.”

He looked confused for a moment before his mouth fell into a small oh. “Are you uncomfortable?”

“I just think it’s a little soon.” She hugged herself looking back up at him. “Don’t you?”

He frowned, looking down at her. “No not really. We’ve been dating for three months, I thought it would be fun. You’re friends with Juleka, I just thought you’d enjoy camping and spending time together. You had even mentioned it before.” Marinette bit her tongue. This was not how she expected this to go.

“I know, I know, I’m just feeling a little confused right now is all.” Luka clenched his palms and Marinette tensed.

“You’re still not over him?” He asked in disbelief.

She looked at him, shocked. “Luka I-”

“Marinette! This guy doesn’t like you, why would you agree to go out with me if you were in love with someone else still?!” She stared at him, tears filling her eyes.

“I do like you Luka! I do, maybe if you just give me some more time I could, I don't know I could try harder!”

Luka shook his head, tears filling his eyes as well. “I’m not a second choice Marinette, I’m a person. I’m not your placeholder until Adrien decides he likes you. I have feelings, I’m not your doll. You can’t just pick me up when you're lonely and stick me on a shelf when you're not that’s not how a relationship works.”

“Luka please I just need some time to sort through my feelings…”

“It's been two years Marinette, three months of which we’ve been dating. How much time could you possibly need? If you don’t know what you want after all of this time you’re never going to know.”

She stared at him, not knowing what else to say. “Please.” She whispered, hugging herself tighter.

“Maybe you shouldn’t come to the show tonight.”

“No Luka, don’t do this.” She couldn’t believe how fast things were going wrong her stomach felt like it was going to fip inside out.

“I’m only doing what you asked Marinette.” He sighed, scratching the back of his head. “Just.” He looked away with a frown on his face. “Just go home and sort through your feelings ok? I’m not going to rush into anything stupid, or do anything I’m going to regret. I like you Marinette.” He looked back at her, a serious look in his eyes. “So go home and figure this out. Until then please just...leave me alone.”

She stared at him, tears leaking down her cheeks. This couldn’t be happening, were they on a break? A breakup? What was even going on? She picked up her bag and quickly left his dorm. She ran past the groups of kids on campus, giving her a strange look as she desperately tried to stop crying.

Who was she to reprimand Kagami when she was no better than her. She couldn’t even get over a boy who barely talked to her and poor Luka was paying the price for that. He was so kind and patient and she took advantage of that. The bus trip back was humiliating, her soft cries and hiccups could be heard by everyone and she wanted nothing more than to disappear. She couldn’t go home yet, her parents would question her, afterall she was supposed to be out with her boyfriend. That stung softly, more tears pricking at her eyes.

She made her way to the park across from the bakery, it was empty and the swingset seemed like the perfect place to cry at the moment. The sun had set and she sat on the swings, face buried in her hands as she cried.

“Marinette.” Tiki's soft voice chimed in her ear. She gently pressed a paw to Mariinette’s face, snuggling her. “I’m sorry Marinette, I know it hurts.” Her words caused another sob to shake through her body. Had she just lost one of her bestfriends? How on Earth was she going to make this up to him.

The thought of never getting to hug him again brought on another sob. The idea of never hearing him play for her brought the second. She felt Tiki zip away into her bag before a voice started her.

“Hey, are you ok?” She looked up quickly, attempting to hide all traces of emotion on her face.

“Chat Noir? What are you...what are you doing here?”

“I could be asking you the same thing, Marinette right?” She nodded her head, big blue eyes red with tears. “Why are you sitting alone in the park? And why are you crying?”

“I asked you first. Where’s Ladybug? Is there an Akuma?”

He laughed softly, taking the swing next to her and plopping down on it. “No no, don’t worry. No Akuma and I'm here alone. If i’m being honest here, I’m running away.”

“Running away?”

“Can you keep a secret?” She nodded her head, wiping her nose. “I got into a fight with my girlfriend and well, this is the only way I can really escape right now. Running away.” He clarified, dropping his hands on his knees. “So what about you?”

She stared at him, biting her lip. “Me too, running away I mean.” He looked at her as though expecting her to continue. “I also got into a fight with my girlfriend. I mean with my boyfriend well Ex-boyfriend I guess.” He looked shocked, moving his hands to the chains and swaying back and forth slightly. Marinette raised an eyebrow, she had no idea Chat had a girlfriend. She supposed that explained the recent lack of flirting, but still she never would have guessed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She thought about that for a moment. Did she want to talk about it? It’s not like Chat Noir could tell anyone, and she couldn’t really talk to anyone she knew about it.

“Uhm...ok. Well, My boyfriend uh ex-boyfriend, his name is Luka, he’s super nice and everything a girl could possibly want in a boyfriend. He’s handsome, patient and thoughtful, and so it should be so easy to love him.” She paused, wrinkling her burning nose. “So easy to be with him and want to be around him, and yet...there’s this other boy .I’ve liked him since I was in middle school and while we didn’t get along at first I found myself pining after him.” She sounded ridiculous, Chat Noir was going to think she was a mess. “Its been years since we met and I thought I could get over him by going out with Luka, stupid I know. But I ended up really liking Luka.” She paused yet again taking a shaky breath. “But I just can’t stop thinking about the other guy.” She felt good to finally admit that. “I like Luka, and it’s so confusing because this other boy will never like me I just can’t get over the what if.” Chat Noir watched her quietly, intently listening to every word she spoke.

“I understand Marinette. I understand completely.” She watched him think for a moment before he spoke. “My life is...complicated to say the least. I’m kind of in the same situation as you, except my relationship was planned out for me.” he looked sad, his shoe making patterns in the dirt. “She’s not the girl I’m in love with but once my father says it, there’s no arguing. But there’s this other girl and I’m crazy about her. She’ll never look at me the way I see her though, and I’m pretty much chained to my current girlfriend for life.” Marinette sniffled softly.

“I’m sorry Chat, that sounds awful.”

He shrugged. “It’s not like she’s a bad person she's just not my person. I had really liked her when we first started dating but I think it was just nice to have someone living the same horror story as me. And I don’t know, there’s just always this pressure, always people watching to make sure I don't mess up. I’m under constant pressure in my civilian life and then once I'm Chat Noir it’s better, because I can actually be myself but there’s still so much expected of me. I can’t mess up and I wish there was a moment I could just...stop! Stop being Chat Noir, and stop being my fake civilian self. I wish I could just be me.”

Marinette stared at him. There she was complaining about being Ladybug and wishing she could just be Marinette, that things would be easier but here was Chat, not able to escape the heat anywhere he went. She watched as his head hung, her heart aching for him. He looked so sad, and broken. She scolded herself, angry that she couldn’t see how her partner was suffering. Angry that she had never thought to talk to Chat about his feelings. Angry that all that was allowed for them to do together was fight. Well, there was something she could do now.

“If you ever need to talk Chat or a place where you can be yourself, you can always come talk to me. No judgment here, I mean you found me crying on the swings. I don’t think I have the room to judge you.”

He chuckled, lifting his head up. “You’d do that for me?”

“Yeah of course, we don’t even have to talk. It helps to stay distracted, we could just...hang out? I know I could use some distraction.”

“What started this whole fight with this Luka guy?”

Marinette groaned, dropping her face in her hands. “He invited me camping with his family and I said no.”

Chat Noir seemed to think this over for a moment before speaking. “Maybe you should go? It could help you figure out how you feel, no other boy around, we’ll call him Bob.”

Marinette giggled. “Bob is nowhere near his name but continue.”

“Don’t interrupt me.” He teased, flicking her forehead playfully. “But with no Bob, no distractions and no pressure it might give you time to focus on how you feel for Luka. Then, if you still can’t focus on him, even with no Bob around to fill your thoughts, then you know it’s not meant to be and you can end it without stringing him along.”

“How do i even do that though? He broke up with me, or at least told me not to talk to him until I know.”

“Well, maybe talk to him about it. Relationships are built on good communication, I’m sure he’d be happy if you tell him exactly how you’re feeling.”

“That’s really good advice Chat Noir, thanks.”

“That’s what a super hero is for. Saving the day, I’m pretty awesome.”

“Don’t ruin it.” She said, rolling her eyes.

“Sorry, you should head home though. It’s late and not safe to be out here alone.” She nodded her head, standing up.

“You’re right. Thanks Chat, I feel better.”

“I’m glad, now here let me walk you home.”

“It’s ok, really, I live right above the bakery right there.” She said, pointing it out.

“Well, then it’ll be a short walk.” She rolled her eyes but didn’t argue further.

“So.” Chat Noir started, as they made their way across the park. “If I ever come over to talk or ‘hang out’ as you put it, will i get free baked goods.”

“Wow, expecting freebies when we only just became friends huh?”

He shrugged looking over at her. “You could think about it as feeding a stray cat.”

“You are no stray Chat Noir, I know that for a fact.”

“You’d be surprised.” There was that sadness in his eyes again, he tried to mask it with a smile but it still caused Marinette’s heart to ache.

“Well then I suppose I could see what I could do. After all, what kind of person would I be if I let a stray cat starve.” He seemed to perk up giving her a small smile as they stopped in front of her door.

“I’ll see you later Marinette.I hope everything works out.” He leaned in, hugging her gently. Marinette couldn’t help but notice how perfectly her face sat under his chin, snuggled into his neck. His arms hugged her tightly, and she hugged back, though a part of her didn’t want to pull away.

“Goodnight, Chat Noir.”


	2. A superheroes secret world

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Marichat if you couldn’t tell, I wrote this chapter all on my phone to excuse any mistakes! Enjoy

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Marinette had slowly started to get used to being alone, well alone apart from tikki. She watched her small Kwami, munching on a cookie contentedly. She wondered what Tikki even thought about, how she handled her emotions. She had to be thousands of years old and was probably the wisest person she knew. The small creature turned to Marinette, a large grin now on her face as she went about eating her cookie. 

Marinette couldn’t help but feel calmer when Tikki was around, she wondered if maybe there was a deeper answer as to why. More than just her being a close friend, or like a second mother.

The knock at her door startled her and she ushered Tikki away before calling that it was open. “Marinette?” Her mother peeked her head in. “Hey baby, it’s almost time to leave for school. Are you feeling alright?” 

Marinette sat up in her bed, blocking out the soft hum of whatever children’s cartoon played on the TV. She felt the tears starting to form in her eyes again and she cursed herself for being so emotional. “Luka and I broke up last night.” Once the words were out, she let out a sob curling in on herself. 

“Oh honey…” her mother pushed herself into the room coming to sit on Marinette's bed. She wrapped her daughter in her arms, rocking them gently. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s my fault.” She whispered. “I’m not sure what to do, it’s not like he’s dead but I just feel so awful.”

“Oh baby, a loss is a loss and you will grieve what once was. Luka has been a big part of your life these past three months, and even for the last few years. It will be sad, but I’m sure the two of you will make up.” 

She slumped into her mothers shoulder. Calming her breathing, it was all so sudden. That could be it too, she hadn’t been expecting to go and end things with Luka that day. She would need to talk to him, discuss the possibility of the trip helping. But was that selfish? Now that she thought about it, was going on that trip knowing that it would make her decision, worse than not going at all?

Her head was spinning. She was so stressed, Hawkmoths attacks had been getting worse, more dangerous and she had been struggling to keep him at bay. She understood now why in most super hero movies the hero didn’t want a relationship. It was just added stress. “Marinette, honey you’re burning up, how about you stay home today and get some rest ok?” She nodded her head and her mother stood up. “Let me go grab you something from the bakery ok? I’ll be right back.”

Marinette watched her mother disappear out of the room before dropping further into her bed. She hadn’t realized just how awful she had felt. Her head was aching from the crying, and her stomach turned with anxiety. Her body felt heavy and she decided her mother was right, she needed some much deserved rest. 

She must’ve fallen asleep because when she woke up, the sun was all the way out and a plate with two croissants sat next to her on the bed. Weird, her mother usually gave her three. She picked one up and it was cold, which was expected. She took a bite of it and chewed slowly. 

“You’ve been sleeping for five hours Marinette it’s noon!” Tikki said, biting onto another croissant.

“And you stole my croissant.” She said, giving Tikki a playful smile. 

“Alya has called you a few times. And you’ve got a text from Adrien as well!” Marinette felt her heart rate rise as she scrambled to grab her phone. A message from Adrien? She noticed the three missed calls from Alya before checking the message. 

_ Adrien- Hey, heard you were sick! We’re all missing you here so feel better soon! _

She stared at it, her cheeks burning and hands starting to sweat. If a simple text could make her feel this way then maybe it was a good thing Adrien didn’t like her like that. 

Her shaking thumbs struggled to text back. 

_ Thanks so much. After resting I’m starting to feel better! _

Adrien was worried about her, she wanted to sing and dance. But then she remembered why she was even here in the first place and her smile fell. Why was being a teenager so difficult? She wished she was thirty, married and already employed with her dream job, that way things didn’t have to be left to the unknown.

Once she finished her croissant she managed to drag herself out of bed and take a shower. The warm water was heavenly and seemed to sooth her aching muscles and stuffy nose. She really needed a day for herself to collect her feelings and focus on herself. A self care day as Rose would call it. 

After the shower she was feeling a bit better, though she decided she would just take it easy and spent hours lying in bed watching old reruns of tv sitcoms and doing some homework on her laptop. Her mother had brought her some tea as the day went by and she hadn’t even noticed the sun setting until she heard tapping at her window. The abrupt sound had caused her to jump. She sat up moving to open it suspiciously. 

“Hello…?”

“Hey Marinette.” She was slightly shocked to see Chat Noir, he must be taking her up on her offer. 

“Oh! Uh hi! Come on in I guess.” She backed up and watched him maneuver his way through the window.

“Nice Pjs.”

She looked down at herself shrieking in embarrassment. Her face burned as she scrambled to get back on her bed and pull the covers over her lap. “Shut up! I wasn’t expecting visitors, you mangy cat.”

He laughed a real laugh and sat down next to her at the foot of her bed. “Sorry sorry, I couldn’t help it. The strawberries are cute though.”

“I said shut up!”

Chat noir smiled and waved his hand in apology. “How’re you feeling today?”

She shrugged. “I guess I gave myself a stress induced fever? I’ve been in bed resting all day, I’m feeling better though.” 

“Well that’s no good Mari, you gotta take it easy.”

“That’s rich coming from you!”

“Hey do as I say, not as I do.” He gave her a kind smile, looking over at her laptop. “Homework?”

“I don’t like falling behind. I miss school a lot because of...health reasons and so I’m usually missing assignments. I always try to get them done at home.” 

He nodded slowly. Marinette bit her tongue, she had slipped up, why had she even said that she missed school a lot. “Well that’s good, not that you’re sick often, but that you’re responsible enough to keep up.” 

“I’d like to think of myself as a fairly responsible person. How are you feeling Chat?”

“Overwhelmed.” She frowned, sitting up and pressing her hand to his shoulder. “I saw my girlfriend today and she had a lot to complain about. Apparently she doesn’t think we’re spending enough time together, when I see her every other day at our lessons, and then we get dinner after. I’m not sure what to say, I’d like to also make time for my friends.”

“Why not invite her along with you and your friends?” He scrunched up his nose as though he had smelt something awful. 

“Yeah tried that once, never again. They don’t exactly get along. She says they’re too loud for her. Her exact words were, ``they don’t enjoy the things we do A-Chat.” 

“And what are those things exactly, that you both like of course.”

He paused, tapping his chin. “I’m not sure she likes anything if I’m being honest.” The two of them laughed and Marinette pushed him playfully.

  
“There has to be something she enjoys!”

“Fencing maybe? That’s not really something I enjoy though, just something to keep me busy.”

“I didn’t know you fenced!” Marinette smiled at him kindly and he shrugged.

“I’m not any good, like I said, I mostly do it because it keeps me busy and out of my house.”

  
“I tried fencing once and it was a disaster. Sports aren’t really my thing, I tend to attract accidents. Sometimes I think I have bad luck.”

“Well Marinette, I hate to break it to you but no one has worse luck than me. I’m a black cat and I have the power of destruction. My power is basically bad luck in physical form.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t know we were competing for who had the worst luck.” she teased.

“Well if we were I would win.” The two laughed and Marinette dropped onto her back.

“Maybe our bad luck will cancel out and we can have just average luck.”

“Or maybe we can ask Ladybug to rub some of her good luck off on us.” Chat Noir suggested.

“You think she’d do that?” She asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.

“No way.” She chuckled again before turning to look at him. He laid next to her, their heads close together, and shoulders touching. He turned to look back at her and her heart skipped a beat. His nose basically touched hers and he sucked in a breath.

“Tell me about being ChatNoir.” She whispered, and he seemed frozen for a moment. His eyes were locked on hers and she could see pink poking out from beneath his mask.

“What do you want to know?”

“What’s your favorite part?”

He closed his eyes, and Marinette noticed he had made no attempt to move. She didn’t know why but she wasn’t complaining. “Running over Paris at night. Jumping from roof to roof is exhilarating, something I don’t think I can explain.”

Marinette watched his face light up, she had run across the roofs of Paris as well but never leisurely. It was always to catch an Akuma. She wondered what it would be like to just do it for fun.

“That sounds amazing.” 

ChatNoir nodded before sitting up abruptly. “I could show you, if you’re feeling up for it.”

Marinette stared at him, wide eyed. “Right now? I mean I feel fine now but are you sure?”

“Yeah of course.” He held out his hand and Marinette hesitated before finally grabbing it. He pulled her up out of her bed, laughing softly. “You should put on a jacket, it gets pretty nippy.” 

“Right.” She scrambled for a long cardigan, slipping it over her PJs. She locked her door, knowing her parents would just assume she fell asleep. She followed ChatNoir onto her balcony and he leaned over. 

“Ok get on.”

“Your back? What if I fall! What if I let go!”

“Marinette, do you trust me?”

“Of course.” The answer was a bit too fast for anyone but Ladybug, but she hoped he wouldn’t notice.

“Then get on.” She hesitated once more, debating if this was a good idea. 

“If I die, I’m haunting you.” He laughed, adjusting her comfortably on his back as she scrambled to get a grip on him.

“You won’t die. Are you comfortable?”

“Yes, aren’t I heavy?”

“Not at all, I barely know you’re there. Now hold on tight.” He grinned pulling his staff out and extending it without warning. The two of them were sent hurtling upwards and Marinette grabbed onto him tighter, an unintentional scream leaving her lips. 

She buried her face in his neck, feeling the wind whipping against them as he leapt from roof to roof with his staff, propelling them off of each one. “Open your eyes!” He called back, somehow knowing she had them clenched tightly. She peaked an eye open, mouth falling agape in awe.

The lights of the city were breathtaking, zipping around them in flashes of color. It was Paris as she had never seen before. She could understand why this was his favorite part. “Chat this is amazing!” She called, as he sent them flying over two restaurants, people sitting below and chatting. She gripped a bit tighter, looking around as he finally stopped, both now standing on the Eiffel Tower. He put her down gently, steadying her with his hands. “I’ve never felt anything quite like that.” She whispered, holding onto his arm for balance. She had been on the eiffel tower plenty of times as Ladybug but she couldn’t recall ever stopping and taking in the beauty of her City. “It's gorgeous.”   
  


“It really is.” He agreed, but when she turned he was looking at her. 

Her cheeks burned and she pulled her jacket tighter around her. “You’ve really got this whole superhero thing down don’t you?”

“I suppose. I spend a lot of time as ChatNoir. I never feel more free then when I’m alone out here.”

“Sorry to take that alone time away from you.” She said, apologetically.

“Well, I’m starting to realize it’s even better when you have company.” She couldn’t help but smile as she turned back to look at the lights.

ChatNoir dropped her off on her balcony with a sad smile. “Sorry I have to go so early but my father will be wondering where I am if I disappear for too long.”

“No need to apologize. Thank you, for tonight. It was a lot of fun.”

  
“That’s what friends are for, but I should be thanking you.” He smiled, leaning down to ruffle her hair. “Now get some rest, no more stress fevers. Ok?”

“Yes sir.” She saluted him, making him chuckle.

“I’ll see you later.”

She waved, and kept waving even as his silhouette disappeared from her line of sight. 

“I know that look Marinette.” She jumped slightly, turning to look at Tikki. 

“I don't know what you mean.” She turned, going back inside, but Tikki kept up.

“You know exactly what I mean Marinette!”

“Shhhh, no way. Not at all, he’s just a friend, A good friend. I’m comfortable around him is all, I can be myself no pressure. A good friend ok Tikki. Emphasis on friend. He’s helping me! That’s what friends do.”

“Sure, I also go on romantic late night rooftop adventures with my good friends.”

“It was not romantic! And he had a girlfriend!” She argued, face blazing.

“Uh huh, sure.” Tikki laughed, flying around Marinette’s head. “Just be careful ok? I don’t want you to make any big mistakes here.”

Marinette took a breathe calming down and smiling at her. “I know Tikki, I wont do anything stupid.” Tikki smiled, patting her arm gently.

“Good, now let’s go see if your mom made anything for dinner!”

“And you say Plagg thinks with his stomach.” Marinette laughed, heading downstairs after her. 


	3. My hearts secret

D CHAPTER 2

“Good morning.” Marinette jumped, turning to look at who had greeted her. 

“A-Adrien! H-hi! Too you to Morning good!” She paused reconstructing the sentence in her head before speaking again. “ I mean good morning to you too!” She mentally slapped herself, attempting to stand up straight and not look like a complete idiot in front of him once again. 

“How’re you feeling? Your mother called and said you were sick yesterday.” He had a worried frown on his face and Marinette swooned. 

“Oh! No! I’m fine! Totally fine here!” He chuckled softly. 

“Well that’s good we were all worried about you. You work too hard, you need to take a break for yourself sometime. You should be more careful.” She stared at him, mouth slightly open. 

“Thank you, I will.” 

“Good good, I’ll walk you to class.” He offered and before she could answer, she tripped over her foot. He reached out grabbing a hold of her, preventing either of them from toppling over. “Didn’t I just say to be more careful?” he teased.

It took a moment for her brain to realize Adrien had his arms around her before she jumped backwards wobbling on her feet but catching her balance. “Yes sorry I’m ok, thanks for catching me.” 

He gave her a comforting smile and nodded his head for her to follow him. “I feel like we haven’t talked much recently.” 

“Oh? Really yeah maybe a bit.” She clenched her fists cursing her awkwardness. “You know how busy it is with school and all. Final year of highschool, how crazy huh?” She added in attempt to actually add something to the conversation other than babbling agreements. 

“Yeah, feels like forever ago when I started here, and met you.”

“Who would’ve guessed the time would’ve gone by so quickly!”

“You have any idea what you’re planning on doing after graduation?” He asked, stuffing his hands in his pockets. 

Marinette nodded quickly though it was a lie. “Well actually, I have a few ideas but I’m not sure exactly what I’ll be doing.” She squeezed her fingers, tugging gently on them. “What about you?”

He seemed to think about it for a moment. “I have no idea.” Marinette watched him in shock. “What? Is that weird?”

“N-No! No Adrien you could never be weird I mean no that’s not weird. I had just assumed you’d be taking over your dad’s company.” She lifted her hands in defense, hoping he didn’t think that she thought he was weird. However, instead Adrien smiled sadly at her. 

“Yeah, that’s probably what will end up happening.” She chewed her lip debating if she should keep talking, she seemed to have already upset him.

“Well what would you rather do?”

“Honestly?” She nodded her head eagerly. What could Adrien want to do, she had never really heard him speak about his life goals. Now that she really thought about it, Adrien was a rather secretive person. “I think I’d want to be a school teacher.”

Now that she could see. “I think you’d be really good at that Adrien!” He seemed to jump at the volume of her voice, but his smile seemed more genuine now. 

“Really?”

“Yeah! You’re super patient and kind and when you helped us all study for that math quiz we all did really good! Plus you didn’t even get mad when I had you repeat the steps three times. I think you’d be perfect at it.” She noticed the pink spread across his cheeks which only made her blush in return. 

“Thanks Marinette. That means a lot to me.”

She froze staring at him, her heart pounding in her chest. “N-No Problem! Happy to help! What’re friends for?” She laughed awkwardly as they entered the classroom, capturing Alya and Ninos attention. They settled in their respective seats and Alya’s stare burned into Marinette’s head. The burn didn’t seem to fade even throughout class, and she knew Alya was going to demand answers after class. Once the bell rang, she took a deep breath and tried to prepare herself for this conversation.

“Hey.” Marinette finally said, turning to look at her best friends.

“Spill.”

  
“What do you mean?”

“You were gone yesterday and never responded to my text. Something happened, or else you would’ve texted me back.”

“Oh…” She paused, Lukas face flashing in her mind. Tears started to swell in her eyes before she could choke them down and Alya cringed. 

“Marinette! H-hey! Don’t cry I’m sorry!” Marinette blinked her eyes rapidly trying to get rid of the tears but it didn’t help. She flung herself down in her self deprecating rabbit hole thinking about how she wouldn’t be going to see Luka tonight. He wouldn’t be holding her tonight, or watching a movie with her tonight. She groaned softly, slapping her hand over her mouth as her shoulders shook. 

“Marinette?” And there was Rose.

“Is she crying?” That was Alex.

“Hey are you ok?” Mylene asked, and she tried nodding her head but the tears kept coming.  _ Oh Marinette get over it already, this was all your fault anyway.  _

“Marinette?” Adrien rested a hand on her shoulder and she wanted to melt away and slide under the desk to escape quickly. How embarrassing, she was actually crying at school.

“What happened?” Alya finally asked, rubbing her arm gently.

“Luka broke up with me.” She whispered. The group erupted into chaos, though she wasn’t surprised when Juleka didn’t say much. She must have already known, she assumed Luka had called to tell her.

“Why?”

“What could have possibly happened, you guys seemed super close!” Rose cried, clasping her hands together.

“Guys, I really don’t want to talk about this in the middle of the classroom.” She could feel Lila’s eyes on her, and it only made her want to cry harder, but this time out of embarrassment.

“Marinette Dupein-Cheng, crying in school! What a drama queen!” Chloe sneered, striding out of the classroom, Sabrina close behind. 

“Back off Chloe.” Alya snapped, though Chloe just kept walking, a smile on her face. Marinette was sure her misery made Chloe happy, though there was no way she was sucking these tears back up.

“Oh Marinette! Are you ok?” Lila cried, and Marinette glared at her, wiping her eyes. 

“Leave me alone. Guys I’m really ok, I don’t want to talk about it ok? There’s a lot to it and I just don’t want to think about it.” She spoke, her voice cracking at the end.

“Ok, well how about we have a movie night?” Alya suggested, and the girls all squealed in agreement. 

“I don’t know, I’m just not really feeling up to it and I kind of just want to sleep and-”

“A movie night sounds fun, can we come?” Adrien asked, pointing to himself and Nino. Marinette froze and stared at him before speaking again.

  
“Well, ok I guess one movie won’t hurt but we can’t do it at my house, my parents are prepping for a big wedding and have been elbow deep in batter all day.” She wiped her eyes again and took a deep breath.

“We could do it at my place.” Juleka suggested. Marinette froze, although Luka didn’t live there, she still felt awkward going, his room would be there. His room where they had their first kiss. His room where they had cuddled and ate snacks, where he had given her guitar lessons. She mentally slapped herself, she needed to control her thoughts or she would start crying again. Her brain felt like it was melting. How on Earth could she miss Luka so much but still hope for Adrien to give her a second look. Her brain also flashed to her late night trip with ChatNoir, but she waved it away, after all it was completely platonic. 

“Ok, thanks Juleka.” Marinette smiled.

“Juleka and I will set up! We can all meet up around 6!” Rose cheered. They all took turns giving Marinette a hug before packing up.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Alya asked as they walked out of the school together. 

Marinette sighed. “I wasn’t exactly trying to hide it Alya. It only happened two days ago and I’ve really just been trying to process it.”

“What happened?”

“Do you think it’s possible to like two people at the same time?” Marinette asked, hugging her book to her chest.

“Yeah I think so. After all, that is the plot of most romance movies. If you couldn’t like more than one person then love triangles wouldn’t be a thing.” Was this a love triangle she was in? It sure felt like one, except, both parties didn’t like her. It was more like a love line after all. A straight line, moving at breakneck pace away from Marinette. “Did this have to do with Adrien?” Alya asked quietly. Marinette took a deep breath and turned to her best friend.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me Alya! I like Luka but I can’t get Adrien out of my head!” She tightened her grip on her books.

“Marinette, maybe it’s a good thing to take a break from Luka. Look at it as a way to clear your head. Listen to your heart girl, afterall, if you were with Luka and still couldn’t stop thinking about Adrien then maybe Luka isn’t your person.”

“Yeah, maybe it’s a good thing we broke up.” She whispered, lip quivering.

“But knowing that doesn’t make it any easier.” Alya sighed, wrapping her arms around her best friend. “It’ll get better Marinette, your heart hurts now but it’ll heal. Focus on school and your friends and maybe the answer will find you when you’re not trying to find it.”

“Yeah…”

  
  


When Marinette arrived to Juleka’s place, she had told herself she wasn’t going to think of Luka but saying something and actually doing it were very different things. She sat on the couch, knees tucked to her chest as they put on a scary movie. Mylene had said no romance movies because it would only make Marinette feel worse. Marinette didn’t care what they watched though, she wasn’t really going to be paying attention. Besides, the scary movie only reminded her she didn’t have Luka to cuddle up to.

She found herself missing Chatnoir though. Her heart jumped in her chest at the thought of just watching a movie with him.  _ What the hell… _

“Hey Adrien-Oh! And Kagami!” Alya sounded slightly shocked, as she gave Marinette a side eyed glance.

“Hey, hope it wasn’t an issue that I brought Kagami. We were hanging out before and I thought I’d bring her along.” He snuck a glance at Marinette and once again, her heart jumped in her chest as it had moments before. Why had Adrien looked at her? Well, maybe he wanted Marinette’s approval, afterall, tonight was really about her.

“The more the merrier.” Marinette said, though her words sounded forced.

“Thank you for having me.” Kagami said, sitting down next to Marinette. “I heard about you and Luka splitting up. I am very sorry, that is truly unfortunate.” Marinette stared at her eyes wide.

“Uh it’s ok. Thank you.” Kagami gave her a stiff nod, turning to the TV. Adrien sat down in between Marinette and Kagami, squished in the two person seater.

“What’re we watching?” He asked.

Marinette zoned out, the warmth of Adriens side soaking into her and driving her heart into hyperdrive. She would not survive this night, not at all. Her head was already starting to hurt from the mere thought of her feelings. Things were too complicated; she truly wished she could just stop existing, maybe for an hour, or day. Adrien adjusted and his arm brushed hers. She sat up straight face burning. Or maybe forever.

The movie started and everyone settled into their spots watching the tv quietly. This was a horrible idea, she was now alone with her thoughts and her thoughts were anything but simple. She wanted to cry again. She missed Luka, but maybe Alya was right. Maybe it was for the best that they called things off, and who was Marinette to try again when she knew she wasn’t over Adrien. 

Luka had said he would be there for her if things with Adrien hadn’t worked out and they hadn’t. He had kept up his side of the bargain, tending to her heart, but he never seemed to be able to truly heal it. And there it was, she liked Luka, maybe even loved him but not the way she loved Adrien. If luka was the warm fuzzy feeling then Adrien was a blazing fire. Being with Luka made her nervous, he was her first boyfriend and she really liked him, he made her feel important and warm but Adrien burned. He made her feel like her skin was on fire, a flame that never seemed to die out even after all of these years.

Tears trickled down her cheeks, but she found herself smiling. She loved Luka, but she was in love with Adrien. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, she needed to admit that to herself. She could be sad, and like her mother said, grieve the loss of her relationship, but she could also move on. She could move on knowing Luka would find a nice girl who felt the same flame with Luka, that she felt with Adrien.

She noticed Adrien look over at her and she furiously scrubbed at her eyes. He gave her a sad smile and gently rested his hand on her thigh. Her skin seared under his touch and her breath caught in her throat. The rest of the movie was lost on her because all she could think about was their skin to skin contact. She sat through the first movie and two sequels before everyone was ready to go home.

“That was good! Really scary huh Marinette?” Adrien smiled, tilting his head at her.

“Huh? Y-Yeah! Really scary, super scary even! Probably the scariest movies I’ve ever seen!” The group laughed standing up and stretching their stiff limbs.

“Well, we should probably head out.” 

“Yeah, thanks a lot Juleka. It really means a lot to me. Sorry about everything.” Marinette hugged Juleka tightly and smiled as the hug was returned.

“You’re welcome Marinette. I hope it gets easier.” 

“I’m feeling better already.” She assured everyone.

“Need a ride home?” Alya asked but Marinette shook her head.

“No, no I think I’ll walk.”

“Well ok. Be careful ok?” 

“Always am.” She hugged her friends, and ignored the ache in her chest as Kagami and Adrien got into his car together. 

She hugged herself walking slowly down the street. Her heart already felt lighter, she’d have to apologize to Luka and let him know that she didn’t think it was a good idea to get back together. They would only be prolonging the inevitable. 

She was a tad disappointed when she got home and ChatNoir wasn’t waiting for her. She really enjoyed their time together. She wondered why she never wanted to be with him before, though she supposed she never had a reason to. As the new guardian, Marinette shouldn’t even be risking having ChatNoir in her house let alone her room. But she had the miracle box well hidden and she was sure there was no way anyone could find it. As Ladybug, it was easier to push him away, it was her duty to protect Paris and everyone in it, including ChatNoir, even if that meant protecting him from himself. 

But Marinette, marinette didn’t have any obligations to ChatNoir. She could just be herself, and she was realizing rather quickly, she liked who she was when she was with him.

“You’re deep in thought.” 

She screamed, hands gripping the iron bars on her balcony. “ChatNoir, you almost gave me a heart attack!” She scolded, watching him sit on the hand rail. “You really need to warn me or something!” 

“Sorry I couldn’t help myself. I saw you walking home alone so I just wanted to make sure you got inside alright. Paris isn’t very safe at night, especially to be walking around alone.”

“Well, when I have ChatNoir looking out for me I don't think I have anything to worry about now do I?” She smiled, leaning back against the railing.

“You flatter me, but you really ought to be more careful Marinette.”

‘Yeah yeah, I will. Oh!” She straightened up, disappearing into her room and coming out with a plate of Macarons. “My parents made too much, they’re out catering a wedding so they told me I could have the leftovers. And I think I remember promising a certain stray cat some treats.” 

ChatNoir hopped to his feet, his hands grabbing the air excitedly as he tried to make a decision on which one to grab. “The rose ones are my favorite.” She said, pointing to the pretty pastel pink ones.

“Then I guess I’ll try that one.” he took it from the plate and bit into it, his eyes closing in bliss. “God Marinette, these are so good. You shouldn’t have let me try them, now you’ll never get rid of me.”

“That's a risk most people face when feeding wild animals. At least you’re cute.” She froze, eyes wide. Did she really just say that? She hoped ChatNoir wouldn’t feel uncomfortable, but alas he was stuffing another macaron into his mouth.

“The cutest!” He laughed, and it sounded so genuine it made Marinette laugh along with him. 

“Wow, modest too. The complete package.” He playfully shooed her away, taking another macaron.

“Did you catch up on all of your schoolwork?” He asked, mouth still slightly full.

“Yeah, I did actually. Although, I’m not sure how well I did, I’m happy it’s at least complete.”

“That’s good, if you ever need any help i’m pretty good at math and chemistry!” He smiled, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

“Oh hush kitty. I’m perfectly fine with finding my own tutor.”

“Suit yourself, but i’ve been told I’m a pretty good teacher.”

“Oh I’m sure.” She laughed softly, looking towards her bedroom. “Did you want to come in?”

“No, sadly I must leave early tonight, but like I said, I just wanted to make sure you were ok.  _ Are  _ you ok?”

She realized he wasn’t talking about the walking home alone and smiled warmly at him. “Yes, I’m ok. I’ve had some time to really think about what I want, and I think what I want is to focus on myself. No Luka, no Bob.” She winked at him. “Just me and my friends.”

“That’s a good idea.” He looked towards the street and back at her. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Her heart fluttered in her chest but she ignored it and nodded. 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow.”


End file.
